Patchy Pop Culture - What Would You Order up at the Masters Champions Dinner?

This article was posted by Elyssa M. Millspaugh. It was reported and written by Chris Dehnel and Ted Glanzer.

Two journalists. 

Two former caddies. 

Two healthy appetites.   And it's Masters week.   So why not? 

A big buzz before the tournament this year was Bubba Watson keeping his menu choice secret for the Champions Dinner. Some mac and cheese concoction wound up on the plates. 

But what about Ted and Chris? Yeah, they are busy running the South Windsor and Vernon Patches, respectively, but there is always tome to talk food. 
And it's Masters week.

So why not in this week's edition of Patchy Pop Culture? What would we put on the menu if we were the defending Masters champ and were able to choose the

Champions Dinner menu?

Here is Ted's order: 

My selection is easy. Taco Bell. But only off the value menu. (I’m worried that the good people at Augusta wouldn’t be able to afford more than that.)

That means just soft tacos, hard tacos, bean burritos and nachos for everyone.  Extra hot sauce.

No lie.

I caddied for years down in Greenwich and my nickname (every caddy had a nickname) was Taco.

In college, a bunch of my friends and I formed a mock fraternity called Tau Beta (Greek letters TB, clever, no?) and I was the president. I. Freakin’. Love. Taco. Bell.

Without question, the move would also be strategic. Because, while I am immune to Taco Bell’s - ahem - curse, surely the rest of the field wouldn’t be. The other players' moves, in other words, would not be so strategic.

Not that anyone has to worry about such a calamity.

While I caddied for years, my own golf game is less than stellar. Indeed, the last outing I played was several years ago, and I had the second-highest score in the field of 120 players (the highest score got a prize for “Most Honest Golfer).

I would have won that dubious distinction, I missed by a stroke by shooting something like 129, but I had a birdie - the only one of my life - on a par 3. So, they’ll have to settle for lobster and steak.

Poor guys.

Chris' menu:

There was a ritual every morning when I was on my way to Century Country Club in Purchase, N.Y. 

Go to the Purchase Deli and get a bacon-and-egg on a roll with lettuce, tomato and mayo. 

It was the staple that took me through the weekend rounds with former British Amateur champion Dick Siderowf, the rounds with then-Ike tourney single-round record holder Johnny Dreyfus and Johnny's rounds with Gary Player. 

Oh and it has another purpose. The rule was - never, no never - head out with Mrs. Stone on an empty stomach.

So that is my choice for the Champions Dinner. The lettuce must be shredded and I might - just might - give the guests the opportunity to skip the mayo and even add some cheese. 

Since it is the South and I have to give a southern chef a chance to show off the cuisine of his or her region, we can go with grits for the side dish. 

Oh …

One … more … thing …

A bottle of Mateus on every table in honor of the Caddyshack garage scene with Carl Spackler. He did win the Masters in the movie, after all.